Your Only Clock is a Foam, So Yr Spanking Never Hurts at WIERD...

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

OK so Very Rare advice tip #3 from thee Apocryphia of the WIERD suggests hertofore from recent past experience - the 'being-in-jail' must come to realize that when one is given the opportunity to make 1 call, beacause all the world is in the sell foam(and the brain, as the WIERD has in the passed suggested is now located in thee palm - endorsing all past histories of cheiromancy thus) that IT only thinks of names, and thus knows no numbers...and this realisssation is significant as it seems quite safe to say that everyone has sold their phones in favor of sell-fones - and today noone knows anyone's 'number'. So the WIERD is sitting in thee VR sell that as does everything endorses 'thee abstraction of everything' sheerly by the fact sells cannot be 'sold' - and it realizes this fact, that the abstraction implicit in sellyou'relair technology has perhaps created the situation in which letters(in 'names') have thus replaced numbers...Very Rare to say the least, considering the origins of the abstract revolution - thee 'birth' of cumpewters had to do with turning all letters into 'binary code'(the NUMBERS '1', or '0' ONLY) - so now maybe its fair to say we've all cum out the other side onto thee VR tits of Mommie - in other words that now numbers are getting their revenge as they mysteriously are dissappearing behind the 'names'...Think about it, how many 'people's' 'numbers' do you really...know.............exactly...VR. So what is a tiny frail girl to do all worried in jail and knowing names but no numbers? The WIERD asks a cracked out friend who killed his wife a few years earlier by stabbing her in thee VR eye with a rusty kitchen fork and out came the exxxcellent answer: "Yo man, Awh don know, mah only clock ees ah fone"(total genius, right)...The thing that is very important about this amazing realisation is that the equation clock=phone is 'literally' a 'symptom' of the fact that letters have replaced numbers...OR...is it perhaps the other way around, Very Rare... For some reason there was something important about the fact that the guy who said this to the WIERD had a full face of blond facial hair - because for the WIERD, medium blond facial hair has always been an allegory of karaoke(an thus as thee WIERD lecture series 'Volume I: The Southside Years' has demonstrated, karaoke is obviously - along with decaf coffee, buying things 'with no money down', etc.) the model for all things 'contemporary', and thus 'abstract'...The reason being, like decaf-coffee(coffee is ITself' because of the fact it 'wakes you up with caffeine) , blond facial hair(on a white dude of course on a blck dude yr just a chelsea queen) from a 'distance' appears as simply(caucasian) skin, and thus the beard is represented as the 'absence of a beard'. So it makes complete sense thus that M.Karaoke Beard man tells thee WIERD that 'because phones=clocks, words have replaced numbers'...On this VR note the WIERD asks for a bathroom break, and no shit the WIERD swears there is an ever too appropriate graphitti above the you'reinall saying 'Time is not money - money is time'...amazing... Won(as opposed to 'lost' of course) would assume that 'Time' equaled 'Money' back in the old daze when clocks still existed and numbers and 'names' coalesced peacefully, but the obvious question that this VR 'graph-eat-he'(literalizing in this case obviously the fact that 'bar' graphs - in powerpoint lectures etc.- do not have anything to do with 'drinking' but rather 'consuming par excellence, and in this case 'eating-he' is an excellent allegory of male cunnilingus...what the fuck could POSSIBLY be rarer than that - more on this VR topic next week(!)) raises is: 'did money replace time BECAUSE OF the fact that let-hers have replaced numbers'...The WIERD has to think a bit on this won...and the thing about thinking of this WON is the constant pressure of the guilt of thee LOSS - the time..its all gone because of the money...Then the WIERD in the frozen coldest moment of a dark synth daze realises IT...Very rare... You see for many years, long before sell foams, thee inhernet, etc. - letters were crying out: 'LET HER!!!', they were all masochistic perverts(and no this is not strictly 'hetero' boyz - think about IT), wanting to be dominated into complete submission and put to bed with that freshly-fucked-glow that the abstract world can never give...So somehow FINALLY when clocks became FOAMS, when he hit her it no longer hurt(because of the padding obviously)...and by default - HE LET HER!!!, Very rare - and 'LetSures' were born, and the floodgates of abstraction opened - 'Sure she said, anything can now be anything, Just LET IT!!! everything=everything, ITs all the same!'... Feeling the Coldwaves blow in the window as the night began to fall, the WIERD sat in thee dark analogue isolation sell and simply WON-dered...who is thee she...I love her...because she is Very Rare...

Wednesday, April 4th, 10pm - 4am
Pieter and Glenn Spin Dark Analogue Synths on Strictly(nonexistent) Digital Clocks...
Special Guest Contemporary Non-Clockwinders: Martial Canterel, Josh Strawn!!!
WIERD @ Home Sweet Home
(Happy Hour and 'La Vague Froide' Happy Hour complete with Very Rare Opera de Nuit Retrospective midnight - 1am!!!)
131 Chrystie St.(corner of Delancey)
J train to Bowery, F to Delancey
Info:(212)226-5708
http://www.wierdrecords.com